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Chatelaine Residences                                        A Culture of Caring - with Karla Frese


                                                                                        I said I DO,                                of the same age. In
                                                                                        but not I will                              2006, hospitalization
                                                                                          DO it all.                                of an elderly spouse
                                                                                    Just because you                                was found to be
                                                                                    vowed I DO , doesn’t                            associated with an
                                                                                    mean you said I will                            increased risk of
                                                                                    DO it ALL.                                      caregiver death. –
                                                                                    Your promise to one                             Meaning the
                                                                                    another doesn’t                                 “healthy-spouse” is
                                                                                    mean that you don’t                             passing away before
                                                                                    have to do it all.                              the loved one they
                                                                                    There is only 1 wife                            were caring for.
                                                                                    “spot”, there can                               Approximately 30%
                                                                                    only be 1 wife-role                             of informal family
                                                                                    and that is you. There are more     caregivers die before the person
                                                                                    than 1 “spots” for individuals who   they are caring for. Some studies
                                                                                    can be his/her caregiver.  We       even show a higher percentage.
                                                                                    have a team of Care Partners        “It's new, it's different, I didn’t
                        55+ Mature -                                                who are trained and experience      know which direction to go.  I just
                                                                                                                        did it, and it was fine.” – Elderly
                                                                                    this with family daily. What to do
                           Independent Living Community                             when your loved one, won’t          spouse caring for her husband.
                                                                                    shower? – It’s all in the approach.  Be aware that you will experience
                      Enjoy a maintenance-free lifestyle                            Won’t eat? (start with desert!)     a “no” phase.  The answer to
                    in our secure, spacious apartments.                             Can’t sleep? (remember              every question might be “no.”
                          ----                                                      active/busy days = restful nights)   He/she doesn’t mean it and has
                                                                                                                        lost the capacity to make
                                                                                    How are you keeping your loved
            Adjacent to Holmes Lake                   Chatelaine                    one engaged?                        decisions because of their
              Affordable, Spacious                                                  Do you have feelings of guilt,      cognitive impairment.  This is
                                                      Residences                    resentment, or stress? Love         where you have to start taking
                    Apartments
                 Security Access                   6201 Normal Blvd.                someone enough to do what is        more responsibility and
                                                                                                                        involvement in decision making. If
                                                                                    needed- reach out for support
              Underground Parking                  Lincoln 486-4165                 today. 402-780-1211 For informal    you face resistance when starting
                Large Party Room                                                    caregivers, such as a spouse,       something new like care services
                                               Mon-Thurs. - 9 a.m. - 4 p.m.
                    with Kitchen                 Friday - 8 a.m. - 3 p.m.           painful feelings — such as guilt,   or change in your routine, stress
                                                                                                                        that it’s short-term, trial basis, or
                                                                                    sadness and anger — are like
            Social Activities & Coffees                                             any other pain. It’s your body’s    mention that it’s “doctors orders.”
                                                                                    way of saying, “Pay attention.” As   While it may be tough to get
                                                                                    a spouse when you feel those,       compliance at first, with patience
                BOOK REVIEW ­ DEADLIEST ENEMY                                       we are here to help. The support    and compassion, you or your
                                                                                    will allow you to care for yourself,   caregiver can learn how to turn
               By reviewer                                Deadliest Enemy by        and improve your own ability to     that response “no” into a YES.
              Linda Stephen                               Michael T. Osterholm      be the one-and-only spouse they     Reach out and find support today.
            DEADLIEST                                     and Mark Olshaker is      have.                               There is only one “you” and you
         ENEMY: Our War                                   341 pages and was         Have you heard of spousal           are not alone. That’s how after all
         Against Killer Germs by                          published in May 2020     caregiver mortality?  Elderly       these years you will say, “We still
         Dr. Michael T.                                   by Little Brown Spark     spousal caregivers (aged 66-96)     do.”
         Osterholm and Mark                               ($17.99, ISBN: 978-0-     who experience caregiving-                    Thank you- Karla Frese
         Olshaker, is an easy                             316-34375-6). The         related stress have a 63% higher
         read about the power of                          hardcover was first       mortality rate than non-caregivers
         infectious disease to                            published in 2017. Find
         disrupt everyday life on                         at Lincoln City
         a global scale. The                              Libraries, at Francie &
         book was first written                           Finch Bookshop, 130
         during the 2016 Zika                             South 13th St., at
         outbreak and after the
         2014-2016 Ebola outbreak and            www.FrancieandFinch.com, or
         published in 2017. In May 2020, it   wherever books are sold.
         was published in paperback with a       Linda Stephen is an author and
         preface about the coronavirus        origami artist in Lincoln. Her new
         COVID-19.                            picture book “The Day We Went to
            Dr. Osterholm is a world-         the Park” celebrates Holmes Lake
         renowned epidemiologist and the      Park and the outdoors through
         founding director of the Center for   1,000+ origami sculptures
         Infectious Disease Research and      (Handersen Publishing, Feb.
         Policy at the University of          2020). Find at Lincoln City
         Minnesota. His co-author is a New    Libraries or wherever books are
         York Times #1 bestselling author     sold or order a signed copy at
         of five novels and 12 nonfiction     TheDayWeWentToThePark.com.
         books. Together, the authors         See Linda’s art exhibit schedule
         share the history of humans and      (including a November 2020 show
         microbes and how the risks of a      at Noyes Art Gallery) at
         global pandemic have increased          Facebook.com/
         as the movement of people and           LindaStephenOrigamiArt
         goods have changed. The book is         or www.LindaStephen.com
         part detective story – showing how
         researchers traced previous mys-
         terious illness outbreaks (like toxic
         shock syndrome in 1981 or SARS
         in 2003) to the origins.
            I like that the book is written for
         a general reader. One does not
         need to be a scientist or physician
         to understand the examples or the
         challenges. I recommend
         Deadliest Enemy: Our War Against
         Killer Germs for anyone wanting to
         understand more about the current
         pandemic, disease outbreaks of
         the past and present (smallpox,
         the plague, polio, malaria, Zika,
         Ebola, MERS, SARS, etc.), or pos-
         sible preventions for the future.
            Get updates to the book and
         more about efforts to neutralize the
         threat of infectious diseases at
         www.ciprap.umn.edu. There is no
         charge, and the information is
         updated daily.
            The paperback edition of
              Lincoln 55+ Seniors Paper            Online at www.Lincoln55Plus.com                   Fall 2020  - Page - 7
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